Part 2 of a 3 part series. Read part 1 here
The final part of the ziplining experience included an optional “Tarzan” jump. It was a cross between a bungee jump and a giant pendulum swing back out over the canyon of doom. Glances of uncertainty were exchanged amongst our small group of new friends. With the adrenaline still pumping, deals were made. “I’ll do it if you do it!” was the term being tossed around. I looked at Ken. He said “I can’t do it, but I think you should. I’ll watch you” “Ok,” I said, “I think I have to.”
The Tarzan jump was a wooden tower built near the edge of a cliff. I watched as our friends climbed slowly to the top, one by one. Looking so small at the top, we then watched as each one leapt off the edge. We laughed nervously at their screams, knowing they were perfectly safe, but also knowing our turns were drawing nearer.
My turn came and I climbed the tower. I was petrified. But I never considered turning around. I had come this far and had just sailed across a friggin’ canyon – I could totally do this. When I walked to the edge, two guides strapped me into a harness and clipped the rope onto my waist. I looked out over the canyon for what seemed like hours, but I know it was only seconds. I took a step, then hesitated and stepped back. I felt the guides each place a hand on my lower back. They led me back to the edge and whispered “go” in my ear. I let go and fell forward.
I fell straight down toward the ground. At the last second, the rope caught me and swung me directly outward, over the cliff. I swung in an arc over the rainforest. This time, I did manage to scream 🙂 The rope swung me back and forth over the forest far below and I took in every second of it. As the rope slowed, my breathing returned to normal and a guide on the ground stopped me and unhooked me. I had tears running down my face and a smile as big as that canyon. The guide looked at me and said “worth it, right?”
“Yes” I said.
The reason I told you this big, long story about my ziplining experience is that all the feelings I felt that day, every single one, are the same feelings I’ve felt over the past three years with my business. In the beginning, it was fun and breezy with a few little bumps along the way (startup). There was a lot of climbing, a lot of twists and turns (rappeling, hiking), and then finally, some comfort as I settled into a routine (The long zipline).
I could have just stopped there, but I wanted more. This time though, it was optional(Tarzan swing). I didn’t have the comfort of my husband being beside me or the choice to have someone hold my hand as I jumped. I knew the risk level was higher, but I also knew I really, really wanted to do it.
Two months ago, I took the metaphorical plunge into becoming a full-time business owner. I’ve actually owned my business for over three years, but I’ve always had the safety net of my “real” job to catch me if photography wasn’t paying the bills. It was the best of both worlds.
But it didn’t feel quite right. And I was failing in a number of ways. Business was going well, but I couldn’t commit more than a certain number of hours to it. And because I was still working a full time job, I was working evenings and weekends, during lunch hours and in the middle of the night. Combine that with trying to keep a house afloat, a relationship with a husband, and two small children that were missing their Mommy (actually, more like me missing them!), something had to change.
Does this sound familiar to you? Have you ever been in the same position? Here’s how it all unraveled for me and how you can make it work too…..
(to be continued…)